5 Lessons from Paul’s Friends Phygelus and Hermogenes
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Phygelus and Hermogenes were two men who followed the Apostle Paul during his ministry. When they first met Paul, they were so enthusiastic about his ministry that they made the choice to follow him and support him in his work. That is, until things got tough. We see in 2 Timothy 1:15 that they became the Christians who abandoned the Apostle Paul during a difficult time.
Can you relate? You have a friend that you love spending time with, that is charismatic and enjoyable to be around, but then things start to change. This friend starts making you question your beliefs. They are asking you to do more for them. And maybe this friend needs more support than you feel you can reasonably give. It’s not an uncommon experience.
These men left Paul's side for very good reasons. Nero began persecuting Christians, and to follow Paul was truly a dangerous decision. These men felt they could not be faithful to the call of Christ in their life in the face of adversity, leaving Paul more alone and vulnerable as he pressed forward to share the good news with anyone who would listen.
Here are some lessons we can draw from these men and their response to adversity.
1. Following Jesus Comes at a Cost
Following Jesus is unsafe. Jesus came to show us a new way of living that calls us to live for God’s Kingdom, which puts us in direct opposition to the evil powers that are at work in our world. Conflict and tension are often the natural result of faithfully following the call of God on your life.
Matthew 5:10-12 says, “Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness' sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you.”
Jesus declares that persecution in response to our righteousness is actually a blessing in the kingdom of heaven. The reward to be gained in heaven is great when we are persecuted for the sake of the gospel. These friends of Paul missed out on Jesus' invitation to lay down their lives for the sake of the truth. When the rubber met the road, they chose earthly security over faithful service to the ministry.
2. When We Walk Away from Truth, It Impacts Others
Paul brings up the loss of these friends at his side because he was grieving the many ways that serving God had cost him. When we choose to walk away from God’s truth, it impacts the spiritual journey of those around us. Paul was discouraged by the loss of his friend's service.
Hebrews 3:13 says, “But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called ‘today,’ that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin.”
We need others to do life with us as we walk this narrow way, so we do not become entrapped by the deceitfulness of sin. As a Christ follower, our choices, our diligence to speak the truth with love, and faithfully following God’s calling on our lives has the power to inspire those around us. However, when we are unfaithful it can lead others to sin. Our choices impact the spiritual community we are a part of.
3. Be a Friend That Others Can Count on in the Storm
If you live long enough, you will face some tough seasons. Friendship is not meant to always be perfectly balanced. We need friends that at times are able to help carry us through those more challenging seasons of life. These men had the opportunity to support their friend and spiritual leader as he was very vulnerable to persecution during this very contentious time. But they made the disheartening choice to abandon Paul.
“Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends” (John 15:13).
During the storm, we have the chance to be those that offer sacrificial love to our friends. As those that are filled with God’s love, let’s offer that same extravagant love that we have been offered, without hesitation. Is someone you love walking through a hard season? Be with them, offer them encouragement and support so they can feel God’s love even in this tough moment.
4. Follow God in Word and Deed
1 John 3:18 says, “Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.” As Christ followers, our faith compels us to action. The belief of these men had not grown roots. They were caught up in something that seemed exciting, sounded good, and was new! But when the real work of being faithful to the truth began – even in the face of persecution – they lacked the fortitude required to remain.
Is your faith strong enough to endure adversity and persecution? So many of us live such comfortable lives, we haven’t been pushed to really dig deep to fully understand what we believe and why. We must know the Word of God so when our beliefs are called into question, we have an answer for our stance.
Do the work now, before you face troubles, so you are ready to be a Christ follower that knows Him in both word and deed.
5. We Can Trust God to Care for Us
While the loss of Phygelus and Hermogenes was discouraging for Paul, he did not go after these men because ultimately he understood that he could trust God to take care of both himself and his friends when their lives diverged.
There are times when we lose people in our lives due to disagreements or other trials, and our inclination is to chase after them or to judge them harshly. However, it’s not our job to do either of those things; our only role is to show love and mercy. God is the judge and author and finisher of each person's story.
We can prayerfully let go when friendships end. We do not have to live with bitterness because we know that we serve a good God. He is the fair judge of each of our hearts and we can surrender our needs over to him.
The Bible is full of stories both big and small that we can learn from. These men that were very briefly referenced in Scripture act as lessons for us on how we can respond to friends and Christ followers when we come up against adversity. Let’s take note of each detail we find in Scripture, and ask that God uses it to reveal more of himself to us.
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