4 Beautiful Benefits of Engaging with God in Secret Prayer

Do you struggle to pray? Is prayer an afterthought, something you do when nothing else is working and you finally realize you can’t fix your problem on your own? We all know that we should pray, but for many of us prayer is another one of those spiritual disciplines that we always seem to fall short of accomplishing. We feel guilty for telling others we’ll pray for them but can’t seem to find the time to pray. And if we do find the time, or we’re called on to pray at church, we feel awkward and at a loss for words.

In His Sermon on the Mount, Jesus teaches us the beauty of secret prayer. Let’s consider His words in Matthew 6:5-8:

“When you pray, you are not to be like the hypocrites; for they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and on the street corners so that they may be seen by men. Truly I say to you, they have their reward in full. But you, when you pray, go into your inner room, close your door and pray to your Father who is in secret, and your Father who sees what is done in secret will reward you. And when you are praying, do not use meaningless repetition as the Gentiles do, for they suppose that they will be heard for their many words. So do not be like them; for your Father knows what you need before you ask Him.”

With these simple instructions, Jesus dismantles everything about religion, and reminds us that our Father desires a relationship with us. He calls out the hypocrite who prays so that others will hear, and invites us to meet with God secretly, in our own private place, with no listening ears except for His. 

Here are four spiritual benefits of secret prayer and an idea to make this practice a priority in your spiritual walk.

1. Secret Prayer Creates Intimacy Between Us and God

Jesus said our Father knows what we need before we ask Him. Prayer is not about getting the right information to God, so He knows what decision to make! Prayer is the opportunity to express every feeling, every fear, every longing, every desire to the One who can help us. Have you ever had a burden that weighed you down until you simply had to talk to someone about it? We were made for community, and sharing our innermost thoughts is a relief. As we open ourselves up to God alone, His Spirit speaks to our spirit. He takes our burdens and concerns, our hopes, our fears upon Himself. We sense His love for us, and we can leave our cares with Him.

“Casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you” (1 Peter 5:7).

2. Secret Prayer Keeps Us from Praying Hypocritically

What is the first thing that comes to mind when someone asks you to pray out loud in a group setting? Is there an immediate sense of panic, afraid that you will not say the right words? Are you focused on your listeners, or on the God to whom you are talking? Do you feel pressure to carefully craft your words so that they make you sound spiritual, or so you won’t embarrass yourself?

If we have taken time to develop a rich, intimate relationship with God through prayer in our own “inner room,” our public prayers will be a natural extension of that relationship. We will delight in joining with brothers and sisters in prayer as we talk to our Father. We will have little consciousness of those around us who are listening and instead have hearts that are intently focused on God.

3. Secret Prayer Reveals and Refuels Our Love for God

Jesus often went off by Himself to a private place and spent time in prayer. Jesus loved people and He spent His days serving, healing, teaching and challenging. He walked miles in a day. He faced criticism as well as admiration. He was with the disciples night and day. I imagine each day ended with Him physically tired and mentally and emotionally drained. How did He refresh Himself? He made time alone with His Father a priority. In His prayer in the Garden of Gethsemane (John 17), we get a glimpse of the relationship between the Father and the Son, and I believe Jesus missed the intimacy they enjoyed in heaven. His practice of secret prayer reveals the depth of His love for the Father.

Likewise, our commitment to praying in secret reveals how much (or if) we enjoy spending time with the Father. After all, it’s just you and Him, with no walls up. Secret prayer enables us to be vulnerable, something that happens when you know you are loved, and you love the Person to whom you are praying. 

“After He had sent the crowds away, He went up on the mountain by Himself to pray; and when it was evening, He was there alone” (Matthew 14:23).

4. Secret Prayer Grows Our Faith in God

When we pray about something but tell no one else, and then see God answer that prayer in a specific, unmistakable way, our faith and confidence in Him grows in a manner that we can’t experience any other way. Sometimes we pray with others, or in a worship service, lifting our needs to Him. When God answers that prayer, there’s always a human-thinking part of us that credits it to coincidence, or that someone just heard our prayers and acted on them. The reality is, God still answered it. But when we pray in secret and see God work, all doubts disappear, and we truly know He heard us!

“In my trouble I cried to the Lord, and He answered me” (Psalm 120:1).

How Do We Develop the Priority of Secret Prayer?

Prayer and the Word of God are meant to be enjoyed together. God speaks through His Word, as the Spirit of God enlightens our minds and hearts to understand it (Psalm 19:8, Ephesians 1:18). Think of God’s Word as a conversation; our prayers are the response to His words.

Here’s a practical example: In Colossians 1:9-12, Paul prays several things for the believers in Colossae. We can “pray those back” to God in specific ways.

“Father, I ask to know Your will. Give me spiritual wisdom and understanding. Right now, I am struggling with a decision about (whatever is going on in your life). Show me the wise thing to do, because I want to walk in a way that pleases You. I desire to bear fruit through the work You have given me to do. I long to increase in my knowledge of You. I feel weak in the area of (your personal struggles). I need Your strength, Your power, and Your might, so that I might be steadfast and patient. I am grateful and filled with joy for the inheritance You have given me as one of Your saints.”

Praying in secret allows us to be completely honest with God, and praying His word gives us confidence that we are praying according to His will. Don’t just read God’s word; use it to fuel your conversations with Him. You will not be simply repeating words; you will have discovered the beauty of secret prayer.

Should We Only Pray Alone?

According to Matthew 6:5-8, is public prayer wrong? Is it offensive to God to write out a prayer and read it, or repeat the Lord’s Prayer? Should we always pray alone? 

Jesus is not teaching against praying out loud or with others, for He often prayed so that others would hear. Praying with other Christ-followers encourages and comforts us. Mature saints have a lifetime of experience and familiarity with the Father and listening to an older believer pray can bless and teach a younger believer as they learn to pray.

Jesus is offering us the opportunity to experience prayer for what it truly is: an intimate time of sharing our hearts with the One who knows us best. No need to worry if we’re saying the wrong thing, or if anyone else will think we are weak or foolish. In private, there is no one to be offended by our prayers for their salvation and no ears to hear our concerns for their spiritual condition. Just you and the Father, in tune with each other’s heart, His Spirit guiding your thoughts and your spirit responding in prayer. 

Photo credit: Unsplash/Ben White

Author Sheila Alewine is a pastor’s wife, mother and grandmother. She and her husband lead Around The Corner Ministries, which serves to equip Christ-followers to share the gospel where they live, work and play. She has written several devotionals including Just Pray: God’s Not Done With You Yet, Grace & Glory: 50 Days in the Purpose & Plan of God, as well as Going Around The Corner, a Bible study for small groups who desire to reach their community for Christ. Sheila has a passion for God’s Word and shares what God is teaching her on her blog, The Way of The Word. Connect with her on her blog, Facebook, and Instagram.