Envy

Proverbs 14:30

Main Idea: Faith in Jesus saves you from destructive envy.

1. Avoid Jealousy and Envy Because They Are Deadly.
   1. Envy is deadly because it hurts you.
   2. Envy is deadly because it hurts the people around you.
   3. Envy is deadly because it leads to other sins.
   4. Envy is deadly because it will be judged by God.
2. Faith in Jesus Will Save You from Envy.

I ( Jon) am a huge Dallas Cowboys fan. When I was younger, I would get really angry when they lost football games and would often slap my hand on the carpet as hard as I could. My dad would look at me and say, “Why are you doing that? What do you think that will do? You are only hurting yourself, and you might break your hand.”

The Bible seems to say the same thing about envy. Envy never helps the situation, and it ends up hurting you. We see examples of this throughout pop culture. In the movie Gladiator, the jealousy of the emperor toward Maximus was the emperor’s undoing. In the movie Toy Story, Woody’s jealousy toward Buzz ended up hurting Woody. In our own lives, our jealousy of others can lead to depression, low self-esteem, anger, bitterness, and other issues. That is exactly what Solomon tells us through the Holy Spirit about jealousy and envy. Jealousy does not help; it only hurts. Proverbs 14:30 says, “A tranquil heart is life to the body, but jealousy is rottenness to the bones.” Jealousy has psychosomatic effects on you (Murphy and Huwiler, Proverbs, 71). It is like a cancer in your soul.

Avoid Jealousy and Envy Because They Are Deadly

When I ( Jon) was a freshman in high school, I was cut from the school’s junior varsity basketball team. I got extremely jealous because the principal’s nephew made the team while I got cut from it. Instead, I played in a city optimist’s league, where anyone who paid the fee could play. I thought that winning the city league championship (which we did) would make things right because I would prove that I was a better basketball player than the principal’s nephew. However, Solomon is right. Winning the city league did not make getting cut from the team hurt any less, it did not put me on the team, and it led to a very depressed year of school.

Envy—wanting something someone else has—is destructive. So many of us want things that other people have. We envy their clothes, their car, their house, their bank account, and their popularity. That attitude is destructive, but the reverse attitude can be as well. Jealousy sometimes looks like the craving to keep what is ours and not let it become someone else’s. Longman explains both of these and makes his own distinction between jealousy and envy when he writes, “Jealousy is the angry desire to keep what we possess and are afraid someone else wants,” whereas envy “is the angry desire for what someone else possesses” (Proverbs, 476).

Though none of us really want to admit this because it lets other people gain even more power over us, we have all felt jealousy and envy. We have all felt spite or resentment when our peers succeed over us. We get jealous when people out-achieve us. Even pastors deal with this. Why is his church bigger? Why are they growing while we are declining? Why do they have so much money for ministry, while we are drowning in debt?

People get jealous for all sorts of reasons. People get suspicious that they might be replaced at work, or maybe a new friend has entered the picture and they are worried their relationships will never be the same. Or your single friend got married and is not spending as much time with you anymore. You are having a hard time dealing with it.

Jealousy happens in all kinds of situations in our lives. Jealousy is common with romantic relationships. You cannot believe that he likes another girl, so you are mean to her all the time. Or you compete for his affection because you want it all for yourself. This kind of jealousy also can happen in corporate life. When your rival has some kind of success, it eats you up; or when he fails, it makes your day. It happens in church life as well. Church members get worried that if the church grows too much they might lose their seat, so they become resentful toward new folks. People get jealous when it comes to their looks. You look at yourself and wish you had muscles like him; or you wish that you had her looks, so you find yourself badmouthing her to other people to compensate for your jealousy. At some point we all find ourselves wishing that we were as strong, as smart, as popular, as successful, as wealthy, as athletic, and as competent as others. Social media can take this to new heights when people post all about their lives and families, which causes even more comparison and jealousy.

The Bible condemns that kind of jealousy, but it is a bit complicated because according to the Bible jealousy can also be a legitimate emotion (see discussion on this in Longman, Proverbs, 307). Like anger, jealousy is not always a bad thing. Jealousy is not wrong when it involves an exclusive relationship being threatened. For example, God is jealous for his people and their exclusive devotion to him (Zech 8:2; Jas 4:5). God is also jealous for his glory (Num 25:11). There should be a positive jealousy and passion for exclusive devotion to God.

The same can be said for our mate in marriage! Some guys are real idiots when it comes to their wife’s jealousy for their relationship. Oftentimes when a wife questions her husband about a relationship with another woman out of love for her husband and concern for her marriage, the husband will get angry and defensive and try to make his wife feel like a moron—like she does not know what she’s talking about. That is ridiculous and foolish. Your wife’s concern for your marriage and her willingness to ask you about it is a gift from God.

However, when it comes to non-exclusive relationships or anger over what belongs to someone else, jealousy is wrong. Not only is jealousy wrong, it is destructive and deadly.

Envy Is Deadly Because It Hurts You

Envy damages you emotionally, mentally, and physically. Proverbs 14:30 says that jealousy has harmful psychosomatic consequences, whereas being content in your heart will lead to physical, mental, and emotional well-being. This verse alludes to the covenant curse of physical decay for those who violate the law, including God’s command that we be content with what we have. Jealousy is a cancer of the bones. It eats away at you (Longman, Proverbs, 307). When you are jealous it can lead to being angry all the time, hives breaking out, eating disorders, uncontrolled rage, or simply not thinking straight. When you walk around jealous and angry, it ruins you emotionally. Jealousy that finds its roots in checking out other people on social media can not only discourage you, it can also cause you to not be thankful for the life you have.

Envy Is Deadly Because It Hurts the People around You

Proverbs 27:3-4 says,

A stone is heavy and sand, a burden, but aggravation from a fool outweighs them both. Fury is cruel, and anger a flood, but who can withstand jealousy?

The theme of these verses is unbearable behavior that other people cannot endure (Waltke, Proverbs, Chapters 15–31, 374). Do you get what the wise man is saying? Violence is bad, and a temper is bad. They are harmful to people, but jealousy is even more destructive! Jealousy cannot be endured. When you are a jealous person, no one wants to be around you and all the drama. It destroys friendships because “fury that stems from jealousy is not open to reason or moderation” (Garrett, Proverbs, 216).

Envy Is Deadly Because It Leads to Other Sins

We see an example of this in the Bible in the way Saul feels about David. His jealousy of David causes him several times to try to kill David (1 Sam 18:9-11; 19:9-11) (Waltke, Proverbs, Chapters 15–31, 375). Jealousy leads to other sins because at its root it is a belief of the heart that what God has given you is not enough. God is withholding his best from you. That dissatisfaction and feeling of inadequacy causes you to lash out in all kinds of ways: violence, gossip, theft, and more.

Another way that envy leads to other sins is when you copy the behavior of the prosperous, wicked person. The Bible says that envy of sinful people—who seem to prosper—leads to imitating their behavior. Proverbs 24:1-2 says, “Don’t envy the evil or desire to be with them, for their hearts plan violence, and their words stir up trouble.” Jealousy of sinful people who are successful will lead you to adopt their behavior to get what they have. Instead, you should see that their behavior is despicable and you should not want to lower yourself to their level. Being repulsed by their angry, badmouthing, and bitter attitudes should be a motivation to avoid jealousy (Waltke, Proverbs, Chapters 15–31, 268).

Envy Is Deadly Because It Will Be Judged by God

Several passages of Scripture warn us not to envy sinners who prosper, since God will judge them. Wisdom says not to join them. Proverbs 3:31-32 states, “Don’t envy a violent man or choose any of his ways; for the devious are detestable to the Lord, but he is a friend to the upright.” The application of the verse is clear: do not be envious of and thus copy the practices of a sinner. It is tempting to be jealous of those who succeed despite their sinful behavior. If it was not tempting, then so many people would not find it appealing. When ungodly people find themselves having all that they want while godly persons have very little, then godliness can seem like it does not benefit much. But we are told to avoid this, and one of the big reasons is that the Lord will condemn the wicked. The tables will turn. The “prospering sinner” will lose all that he has, and the righteous will be rewarded in the end. God’s approval abides on the content person, and that approval is worth so much more than those good-looking things the sinner has. God tells you to trust his Word rather than your experience because the prosperity of the ungodly is only apparent; it will be short lived.

Proverbs 24:19-20 adds the eternal perspective: “Don’t be agitated by evildoers, and don’t envy the wicked. For the evil have no future; the lamp of the wicked will be put out.” Do not be jealous of sinners, since the tables will be turned at judgment. The sinner has no future. So it is foolish to adopt his ways for a few decades of pleasure and seeming prosperity in light of eternity.

It is clear from Proverbs that the wages of jealousy is death: it rots your bones, it destroys your relationships, and it will send you to hell! So jealousy is a matter of life and death. Envy causes you to shrivel up, it eats away at you, and it casts you into darkness. The apostle Paul says about jealousy that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God (Gal 5:19-21).

Faith in Jesus Will Save You from Envy

Proverbs 24:19-20 gave the negative warning, but Proverbs 23:17-18 gives the positive promise, “Don’t let your heart envy sinners; instead, always fear the Lord. For then you will have a future, and your hope will not be dashed.” We see in these verses a positive strategy for dealing with our jealousy, and it just happens to be the theme of Proverbs: fear the Lord. That means to fight off envy and jealousy in your life is to trust in the Lord—to have whole-hearted confidence in him! Again, there is a temptation to be jealous of prosperous wicked people in such a way that you copy their actions. What is the antidote? The antidote to jealousy is contentment in the Lord. What is the motivation for this contentment? The future reward of eternal life is the motivation to be content in the Lord. Again, you must have an eternal perspective (Col 3:1-2). In light of eternity, if you fear the Lord, you will experience eternal blessings. In contrast, the wicked will lose everything that they have.

Proverbs 24:20, interpreted canonically, may refer to the preservation of the messianic line because the “lamp” often refers to progeny (Fox, Proverbs 10–31, 564). The lamp is connected to the Davidic dynasty because David’s life is referred to as the “lamp of Israel” and God is concerned that David always has a lamp in Israel (i.e., an heir; 2 Sam 21:17; 1 Kgs 15:4). Psalm 132 applies the same lamp imagery to the Messiah. The hope is to preserve the messianic line until Messiah comes by not envying the wicked. The promise of an eternal kingdom ultimately brings an overlap of posterity with eternal life. There either had to be an eternal succession of faithful posterity or eventually an eternal son who lives forever. The resurrection of Jesus is where the two ideas meet. We can enter this eternal kingdom if we trust in the King and thus turn away from jealousy toward him!

Believing the gospel brings eternal and abundant life—the life that God meant for you to live. That is what the book of Proverbs is all about. The gospel story itself is a story about jealousy. Jealousy killed Jesus. His influence over the people drove the Jewish leaders to insanity. After all, the Bible says the Jewish leaders handed Jesus over to the Romans “because of envy” (Matt 27:18). Not only was it the jealousy of the Jews that caused the death of Jesus, but our own jealousies killed him. He hung on the cross to pay the penalty for our jealousy. Every time you resented someone else’s promotion, got green-eyed at someone else’s popularity, or raged at another person’s good looks, you added your sin in killing Jesus.

But the good news is that God’s jealousy to have an exclusive relationship with us motivated him to send his Son to die for our sins. Even though his bride had satisfied herself with so many idolatrous lovers, God was zealous to purchase her and satisfy her with himself alone. He loves you and wants you to be his. So say this to yourself when you feel jealousy rising in your heart: Jesus drowned in his own blood so I can be satisfied in him. I don’t need those things that I so jealously want because I have Jesus, and he is all I need.

Conclusion

We have been jealous and envious; but Jesus, who never was, died for us to forgive us and save us. He is the one who can not only forgive you for your jealousy, but he can also empower you by his Spirit to live a life that is free from envy. As we have seen throughout Proverbs, foolishness is a faith issue. The problem is not one of effort but of belief. Foolishness in our lives shows us that we are not believing in Jesus, and that is so true when it comes to the foolishness of jealousy. You are jealous because you are not satisfied and happy in all that he is for you. Faith in Jesus will free you from that jealousy. Your future hope in Christ is much greater than whatever that alluring thing is that someone else has right now.

Reflect and Discuss

1. What are some classic stories of jealousy and envy? What do they reveal about jealousy and envy?
2. What are some ways that we get jealous?
3. What are some ways to be rightly jealous?
4. Practically, how can we jealously protect our marriages?
5. What are some ways that jealousy and envy hurt you?
6. How does jealousy affect your family?
7. What are some ways that jealousy and envy lead to other sins?
8. How can we fight against being envious of wicked people?
9. How can having an eternal perspective help you battle envy in your life?
10. How does believing the gospel help free you from envy?